MichaelDePaula.com : god is a nigerian scam

Sunday, June 29, 2008

god is a nigerian scam

So God has something great to give to you (eternal life and ultimate happiness) and all you have to do is give him something else in return up front. From your point of view, it seems like a great trade-off because you’re not really required to do anything except believe that he will one day give you the prize if, during your lifetime, you never stop believing that he will give it to you.

But then you notice 10% of your income disappearing each month out of your bank account. And then you find out that you are “encouraged” to attend meetings where other people like yourself get together to donate more money towards other causes God has set up. And you notice that your life is, in fact, not getting any better. It’s getting worse. You can’t meet your monthly bills, your kids are getting sick despite your best intentions, and your coworkers whisper words behind your back like “sucker", "fraud", and "scam”. And, worst of all, this God guy will never commit to meeting with you in person to talk things over.

So you regularly get down on your knees and fire off an email to God. You ask him about the 10% withdrawals each month from your bank account, the long-winded meetings, and your tribulations. He responds by saying that the 10% withdrawal is a small, insignificant transaction necessary to keep his overhead costs down. You get the feeling that you shouldn’t be complaining about only 10%, I mean, some members are, you hear, happily giving 15% or 20%. And, after all, look at what you’ll get in return when it’s all over! God also responds that meetings are a good thing because he knows people will get the kind of attention and encouragement from the weekly meetings that they need to be happy. And the tribulations? They are not God’s fault, of course. There’s a guy out there named Satan who doesn’t want you to have that eternal gift. (Strangely, he himself used to have it and then he gave it up—but for what reason you wonder to yourself?!?).

And the months and years drag on. The emails become routine. Every so many weeks your church brings in a special guest speaker who claims to have a special relationship with this God guy. The urge everyone to stay the course, keep believing and keep giving your hard-earned dollars to support God’s enterprises. It’s only a matter of time before God will come in person and give you that reward. And why would you want to quit now and waste all that time, money and effort you’ve given so far?

Posted By Michael DePaula At 2:08 AM • Comments (0) Trackbacks (0)

Trackbacks :
http://michaeldepaula.com/blog/track.aspx?id=77

Please logon or register to comment.